they say there's a pill for everything. "I'm feeling careless, restless, etc..." "oh, we can take care of that". less is more...take away the less and you and you get care and rest. two things I don't have and I'm almost positive there is no pill for heartless, unless overdosing counts. although that doesn't get you anything except maybe a hospital bed and a bruised ego. lovely bones and lonely homes. I can almost hear you lying next to me but when I turn my head I realize it's just the low hum of the computer. sometimes I think of moving north but then I remember you always hated the cold. and I hate what you hate...should I hate myself? I'm not trying to break your heart - you can't break what's not there. you break it you buy it and now you're deep in debt. I would help you but you say "I can stand on my own". seeing is believing...I saw you, I believed in you, and look where that got me.

"there's a lot that I don't know
there's a lot that I'm still learning
but I think I'm letting go
to find my body is still burning
and you hold me down..."